A poem inspired by Jamila Woods's I Miss All My Exes
I Miss All My Eras 1
After Jamila Woods
I miss all my eras
When my body was a fine line that was only visible from certain angles
that moved like a ghost in another time.
That filled in but never filled out.
That took up space as a rhetorical device rather than as a manifestation.
You wouldn't believe it, but I miss it;
I don't have to want it to miss it.
I cherish the finer things,
that slip through my fingers
the way I slipped through fingers.
I will always love small and delicate things.
I will always love
every era
The ones that I marked by who I was dating
(I still love you all)
The ones that I marked by what pants I ripped or outgrew
(I still love you all)
The ones that I marked by where I lived, or where I worked
(I will always love you)
I miss all my eras
I sit in my car finally crying the constipated tears out of my chest
while listening to Jamila Woods.
I remember what it feels like to yearn for myself and our history.
I remember who I was when I loved you,
each of you
I remember that
"I never left any one of them, not really
I just went somewhere new" 2